I wish you would have actually listened to me before ranting in slanted ways.  It doesn't make you look good, especially when the only one agreeing in plain sight is a little dense in relationships himself.

I'd like to argue that I said "too busy for a DISTANCE relationship," one you were also clearly too busy to keep.  Also, NOTHING happened that weekend.  He WAS dating someone else, and I was with you.  I understand boundaries; we were friends.  You held onto your crushes even through our relationship, hell--even though at least one of them has a boyfriend and both even REJECT you, you don't hide your feelings from ANYONE.

Your snide remarks I hate to admit are hurting me, just as much as your horrid yelling and accusations.  You're not perfect, and anyone with any information could see we weren't working.  At least I wasn't the one coming to visit expecting sex; the whole relationship loses its shine when that and not calling are the consistencies. 

The bitterness at me and the whole world needs to scale back if you're ever going to be content, let alone truly happy.  I know it looks like a pattern, but then again, I've never dated a genuinely nice guy before.  I am currently happy, which you obviously cannot say, and I expect this time to really work.  At least I never give up.

The more journals I read, even at random, on different blogging sites, the more I realize I am entirely unoriginal.  This includes but is not limited to:  emotions, experiences (both physical and mental), future plans, even the phrasing in these journals is about the same way I'd express myself (in some cases, better).

Pathetic.  But then again, I like me.  One of the few to do so.  I guess that's the only way to really handle life and still strive for happiness when the original, "real" you just isn't quite good enough.

Also, I'd like to note that most people and things ARE "real," in the sense they EXIST.  People tend to forget that when speaking, though I will allow for imaginary friends.  But even those guys tend to be more "real" to some people.  I'm going to try to replace "real" with words like honest, genuine, and actual depending on the circumstances.

You Are a Lemon Poppy Seed Muffin You are smart, sophisticated, and savvy.
You love taking risks, and you are the first to know about new trends.

You are curious about the world and tend to have many interests.
You also are very talented. It sometimes seems like you are good at everything.

You are very social and inclusive. You'll be friends with anyone.
Even though you're very cultured, you're not a snob.


On a different note...no one updates here anymore.  I like to think it's a better place to say stuff I don't want people to know since only two people are really my friends on here that check reasonably (every month or two) and hell, I could just walk 3 doors down to talk to one of them, so almost no point anymore.

I miss the way Jeff and I used to be....so just fun and lighthearted.  His busyness really weighs on our ability to reform our relationship, and I'm getting impatient....but my feelings are too strong to turn back now.  *sigh* frustrating.